Keeping Up Appearances Part 1

Think back to when you first started dating your husband.  You spent hours picking out the perfect outfit, doing your makeup, and getting your hair just right.  You tried so hard to impress him, to make sure you looked your absolute best.


Now you’re married, perhaps you have kids.  Take a peek in the mirror, what do you look like right now?

Are you the housewife that has a closet full of yoga pants and sweatpants?  Do you consider it a good day if you’ve run a comb through your hair and put on a little concealer or mascara?  Let me ask you this… what happened?

Hey, little girl, comb your hair, fix your make-up, soon he will open the door,
Don’t think because there’s a ring on your finger, you needn’t try any more.
For wives should always be lovers too,
Run to his arms the moment that he comes home to you.
I’m warning you,
Day after day, there are girls at the office and the men will always be men,
Don’t stand him up, with your hair still in curlers, you may not see him again.
Wives should always be lovers too,
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you.
He’s almost here, hey, little girl, better wear something pretty,
Something you wear to go to the city,
Dim all the lights, pour the wine, start the music, time to get ready for love.
Time to get ready for love, yes it’s time to get ready for love,
It’s time to get ready for love…

Frank Sinatra , “Wives and Lovers” 1964

This song speaks volumes.  Wherever your husband may work, an office, a hospital, etc., chances are there are plenty of pretty women there that woke up that morning and actually got ready for the day.  They are at work looking their best, and the men around them are noticing.  What did you look like when your husband went off to work this morning?  Were you still asleep, yesterday’s mascara smudged around your eyes, hair a mess?  Were you in the vanity with half your hair in curlers and no makeup on rushing to get ready?  What were you wearing?  Were you in over-sized sweatpants and a t-shirt or a bathrobe?

That was the image of you your husband had when he went off to work to be surrounded by lovely women.  Lovely women that are attracted to a hard-working, successful, handsome man like your husband.  Women that would be more than happy to take your place if they had the chance.  And perhaps if your husband’s last image of you was smudged mascara and bedhead, saying no to one of these lovely ladies might be a little harder.

Joan 4

I have three little ones at home; 4, 5, and 6.  I get it.  There are days when the thought of getting out of bed and getting dressed makes me want to gouge my eyes out.  The alarm goes off and I want nothing more than to throw it out the window and pull the covers back over my head.  There are days when those comfy yoga pants and a zip up sweatshirt seem to be calling my name.  Then I remind myself, who am I getting ready for in the morning?  What kind of example am I setting for the children?  I’m not saying that you should be in full makeup and 4 inch pumps at 6:30 in the morning, but you also shouldn’t look like you just rolled out of bed.

The way you look and are dressed changes your whole attitude.  Think of the way you walk when you’re wearing a pair of pumps vs a pair of flip flops.  What is your attitude like when you’re in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt vs a nice dress with matching accessories?  It’s like you’re a whole different person!  The appearance of a 50′s housewife is something that I truly admire.  They wouldn’t dare let their husbands see them in less than their best, even while feeding a baby, dealing with a screaming toddler, and making breakfast all at the same time.  How many of you have seen the movie The Stepford Wives?  Yes, they were robots, I understand that.  But they looked absolutely stunning all the time.  And that is something a real woman can do just as well as a robot with a little effort.  Why is it that once a woman is married she loses that desire to look “perfect” for her man at all times?  Wives get so comfortable in their relationships, they get this whole thought of he married me, he loves me for who I am, I no longer need to put effort into how I look.  WRONG!  Absolutely wrong ladies.  In fact, it should be the opposite.


You should look lovely when your husband sees you in the morning.  Wake up before he does, put on some mascara and powder or concealer at the least, add a little blush or bronzer to your cheeks.  Give yourself some color.  Brush your hair and give it a simple style that you can go back and perfect after he’s gone to work.  Put on some perfume.  What does your husband like to see you dressed in in the morning?  Have you ever even bothered to ask him?  Perhaps the sight of you making his eggs and bacon in your lace nightgown drives him wild.  If he’s too rushed in the mornings to really notice then you can put on some nice slacks or skirt and a blouse, or if you have time a nice dress.  Leave him with the image of you that keeps him staring at the clock all day because he can’t wait to come back home to you.  He goes to work everyday and works so incredibly hard so that YOU can have the best job in the world of staying at home and caring for your family.  The least you can do for your husband is put some effort into looking nice for him.  Don’t let him lose sight of that beautiful girl he fell in love with, the one who made sure she looked her best for him at all times.  Remind him that he made the right decision in choosing you!


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