The Curse Of Overthinking

I saw this on Facebook the other day and I thought “Wow! This could not be more true!” I just had to share it with all of you.

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How many of you are guilty of this? I know I sure am, probably too many times to count. I think this one of the worst traits we have as women, and in order to have a successful relationship and not drive ourselves insane it’s something we must learn to control.  Men are nothing like women. For the most part, they are pretty straightforward and actually mean what they say. When they say nothing is wrong, they mean it or they don’t want to talk about it. If they want to discuss so,egging with us, they will.

if you truly want to upset a man, sit there and nag at him trying to figure out “what’s wrong”. Chances are nothing was wrong before, but now something is. He’s annoyed with you!  We must learn to accept things at face value And not pry. Most men don’t like talking about what’s going on with them or their problems, quite the opposite of women, and we must remember and respect that. If he does want to discuss something with you, trust me, he will.

The example above is just the perfect example of what we tend to do. The woman is sitting there basically having an anxiety attack thinking her relationship is over because her husband seems distant, when in truth he’s just trying to figure out why his motorcycle won’t start. Chances are if a man seems distant, he is stressed out about something work related or something completely unrelated to us. If you notice your husband acting this way, the best thing to do is give him space. Don’t hover or be overbearing, give him a soft kiss, tell him you love him. If he likes a specific drink or glass of wine, make him one. Ask him if he needs anything, then five him space. Don’t try to strike up conversation when he’s clearly not in the mood. Let him have some peace and quiet, some relaxation time.

We must learn not to take everything so personally. And trust me, this takes time. My husband works an incredibly stressful job and crazy hours, and often comes home stressed out and exhausted. So if I haven’t seen him in a day and a half and he doesn’t come home overly excited to see me, I am not offended or upset. I understand that he is of course happy to see me, but the only thing he’s probably think about is how nice it’s going to feel once he takes his shoes off mad collapses on the couch with a glass of wine! Too many times I hear wives getting upset with their husbands within the first 5 minutes of them walking through the door. “Aren’t you even happy to see me?  Why didn’t you notice the new drapes?  Where’s my thank you for spending all day cleaning the house?” Do you think that’s what they want to come home to?! If they expect that when they come home from work I bet you will notice his work days getting longer and longer and him coming home later and later.

Like I mentioned before, none of this comes easily. It takes a lot of time, practice, and patience. I think the first step in overcoming your overthinking is being aware of it. Be aware of when you are doing it and stop yourself. Stop getting worked up and stressed out over nothing! If you are able to control your overthinking not only will it improve your relationship, but you will find yourself to be so much happier because you are not worrying and stressed out all the time. You will feel relaxed and tension released from your shoulders, neck, and jaw. It’s amazing what it can do for you!

So my dear ladies, your homework is to become aware of your overthinking and stop it when you notice it. Stop taking things personally and trust and love in your husbands!

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