My thoughts on our drastic changes in behavior.

Let’s start by thinking about one simple concept.  Could you imagine talking or acting towards your parents the way your children do to you?

Really, take a few minutes to think about that.

Hopefully you can own up to the fact that the answer to that question is no.  Never in a million years would it be ok.  I’m not saying that your children or mine are horrible, but my goodness how times have changed.  The manners and etiquette of children is nothing like it use to be.  In today’s day and age most kids spend their time with their eyes glued to a TV, tablet, or smartphone.  And it seems to be happening at a younger age.

How often do you see a young boy holding a door open for a woman or girl, taking of his hat when he goes into a building or speaks to a lady, or even pull out a chair for her at a meal?  How many times a day do you see a child talking back, arguing, and being downright disrespectful to their parents?

Mother seeing children off to school

Perhaps one major thing that has changed is the way we view our families.  Today, children seem to be the complete center of our universe.  Our lives revolve around them.  And in many families the children’s needs even come before a spouses.  In the 1950’s, this was not the case.  I’m not saying they didn’t love or care for their children, that wasn’t the case at all.  But the family dynamic was different.  Mom and Dad were the King and Queen, the rulers, they were in charge and questioning them was not considered.  More than anything, they were treated with respect.  Never did they have to ask their children to put their phone or ipad down and help bring in the groceries.  Children did this because it was expected of them.

We’ve all heard the expression “speak when you are spoken to”.  I admit my children most definitely do not follow this rule.  Children of the 1950’s however did.  They had this respect for their parents and other adults that I feel has been completely lost in our modern times.

I hope you don’t think I sound like a broken record, but I think there is one very obvious thing that has changed in the lives of children since the 1950’s.  The role of women.  I’m not saying we should go back in time when women weren’t allowed to vote, drive, or have a voice.  I don’t believe that and I believe the original idea of feminism has done wonders for women all over the world.  But a major change is that the majority of women are not at home, they are not the ones raising their children.  The majority of children today are raised by teachers in day care centers, after school programs, or a nanny.  Mother’s are not the woman raising their own children.

And these care takers cannot be blamed.  They are not the parents.  Sadly, when you see a child that continuously misbehaves, say at your child’s school, have you noticed their family dynamic?  Is the mother there dropping her child off at school and picking them up?  Is there a father in the picture?

That’s another thing that I believe has contributed to the downfall in children’s behavior.  Divorce rates are higher than ever and continue to rise.  Do you know what the divorce rate in the 1950’s was?  It ranged between 20-25%.  Today it is 50%.  It has doubled!  There is no question that divorce has a negative affect on children, and perhaps their decline in behavior is a result of this.

family

The “golden age” is lost, and it seems as though things are only getting worse.  We are at the point now where we can’t even let our children walk to the store to get a candy bar, or ride their bikes up and down the street in the neighborhood.  It’s no longer safe.  I think of what a drastic change just the last 20 years have been, what is in store for us in the next 20?

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3 thoughts on “My thoughts on our drastic changes in behavior.

  1. I would like to believe that the next 20 years will bring back the way things used to be! I would hope that people have experienced enough disorder in their lives to decide to go back to doing things the way our grandparents did. They had problems, yes, but they were happy, they were respectful, they were modest, and they didn’t believe in throwing things away just because they were broken.

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